This too shall pass...(like a kidney stone)

As a full time mom of four little rascals sometimes I feel like the day will never end, that I'm actually moving backwards (as far as getting anything accomplished) and I just want to sit down and cry!  I'm soooo far from perfect.. I'm not even in the same hemisphere.  But I really do get so much joy from being a mom. Watching my children grow fills me with amazement and appreciation for the life the Lord has blessed me with.  I can easily say that I love every day of being a mom  (but maybe not like it every moment).  Today I had one of those moments...

But at the same time, I know someday I'll miss moments like these!  And thats what I kept saying to myself as I swept up about 8 cups of this flour up, and vacuumed the carpet, and wiped down the back of the sofa, and started the laundry, and bathed my boys...

It's alive!

Bennett just made my day!!

He refuses to talk; he has a repertoire of about 10 words and still he prefers to sign. In fact, he uses "Eee!" to refer to almost anything.  By the time a child is two, they are supposed to have about 200 words.  I know that if I were to take him into the pediatrician, the state would provide a speech therapist to come to our home every week to work with him.  But at the same time, while I know he is significantly behind the curve, I haven't been truly concerned. Then this morning as I was lying in bed Cam came in and started to ask for breakfast and in walks Bennett...


"Mom, can you make ...uh...pancakes?" 

WHAT?!? I was dumbfounded! He has NEVER put more than two words together (He doesnt even say his siblings names). So I turned over and asked Billy "Did he just say...?" and Bennett interrupts me

"yeah, I did." 

Ahhh! I just couldn't believe it! The clincher... he hasn't said anything since. ;-( Stinker! I still have a hard time believing I didn't just imagine it! But Billy was there too, so I know I wasn't dreaming!  Now I know he CAN talk, but just doesn't care to. 

Bennett. Head, Shoulders, Knees, and Toes!

Birthday Boy

I cannot believe that it was today (about this time) just one year ago that we welcomed Bennett into the world. He is just the most amazing little boy ever and I cannot even put into words how much I love him or how much he has added to our family!
I knew, even months before I found out I was pregnant, that there was a neat little boy up in heaven waiting to come down to our family. Then when I held him in my arms I knew that he was the missing piece to our family puzzle and that he has a very specific and special mission here on earth. I am so grateful for my little boy. Never has a child been more full of joy! No child has ever been happier and more loving than this little guy. I thank God every morning when Bennett greets me with his toothy grin that God saw fit to allow me to be his mother! He is my miracle.

Birthday Party!!!

My baby i turning 1! I can't believe a year has almost past since I brought this tiny baby home from the hospital. SO it is time to celebrate!

What: Bennetts 1st birthday party/ potluck dinner!
When: Sunday, Oct 24th @ 5:00
Where: Our place!
Other info: Unless you have a better idea we will be eating taco salad. I will provide the meat/chili and also dessert. Please let me what you can bring. This is what we need: chips, lettuce, tomoatoes, cheese, salad dressing, sour cream, guacamole, drinks, or paper goods. Please have it preped and ready to eat, but no birthday presents please (we just want enough good food for a great time instead)!

It is sure to be a blast, hope you can come!

I'm learning

Last night as Bennett screamed, I cried. It is soooo hard to see/listen to your child be hurt, or afraid, or even angry when you know you could rush right in and it two seconds it would all be over. Problem with that is that they don't learn or grow...I am begining to understand in the tiniest littlest bit what my Heavenly Father feels; and I dont enjoy it!

Time for Mommy to grow

Well I know every ones reaction when I tell you this next bit of information is going to be disbelief and maybe a little disgust:

My 10 month old still does not sleep through the night!

He still gets up at least once for a bottle and a couple of other times in the night for who knows what. I know, I know, there is NO reason he should be doing this still. Or rather, there is no reason I should be doing this. But for some reason it is unbearable for me to listen to him cry when I know that all I have to do is get up for a minute and then everything will be OK (at least in the short-term)! This is the reason I could never handle twins! I feel so much worse than even my crying child, and "I cant help myself".... but now I am pregnant. And as my belly grows, so does my exhaustion, and my resolve (sort of) to get past this nightly dilemma. I don't know why I can't do this! I know it is my fault my kids aren't sleeping through the night until months after they learn to walk.

I don't know how to do this.

Bennett is old enough now that he will take it personally and be hurt if I just ignore him and leave him in the crib. In fact, I tried, but true to his brother, he just puked all over!

My mother has had a difficult time of letting go of her children and letting them figure things out on their own. I have the same problem; if I see a situation, I want to help and put a band-aid on everything, whether or not it is truly for the good of my child. Lame, I know. Stupid, I know. Let just say the next few nights are going to be hard on Bennett, but especially on me. Mommy, its time to grow up!

I just pray I have the strength to do (or not do) what is needed!

Spaghetti Dinner

Bennett loves his food!

milestones

Wow!  Bennett is growing up so fast!  Its kind of sad since I know I don't have another baby in my future anytime soon.   He is sitting up on his own and he can get around a room just fine on his toes and hands (he either does the army crawl or he gets into push-up position and then pushes off with his toes until he faceplants, and then he does it again).  He is even loving solid foods!  Today he had some rice cereal, applesauce, banana, and then knawed on some pizza crust, yum!  It's amazing what parenthood does to you; all of a sudden a simple smile or step means the world to you.  Those moments are made up of just pure joy!  I'm so blessed to have 3 healthy wonderful and exhasting kids!